How A Phony Persona Always Hurts You

By Brian Maloney

ĎBe yourselfí, isnít that what youíve always heard? It
certainly isnít ill advice considering what you are losing in
the long run when you adopt one of these fraudulent lives.

You may ask, whatís adding a little sizzle hurt any?

Itís not the extra energy that you bring to the table as long
as itís your true personality. It is the egregious
transformation from you knowing who you are, to a
personality that you may or may not realize is fraudulent.

Whether you call it fake, phony, fraudulent, multiple
personalities or whatever, it pretty much adds up to the
same thing. It is not who you are. I know, I, not unlike
millions of others, had taken on the ĎMr. Hollywoodí
whenever a situation called for it and my color changed like
a chameleon to suit my environment.

Adolescents are always trying to one up each other in order
to cement themselves into an ever-changing social
structure. You may see it at the mall when a pack of
thirteen year old girls float through an area you are
shopping and their volume is much more accentuated than
that of 99% of everyone elses..

It is almost as though, since everyone else is always trying
to put on their respective show to the world that if you
donít, youíre afraid you wonít stand out; youíll be bland
and boring. When youíre not trying to impress the world
with your made up personality, youíre just that regular Joe
that you or anyone else will see as unique.

That mindset couldnít be farther from the truth! In fact,
when you change your fundamental persona to suit your
environment, you not only hurt yourself with a lie, but you
lie to everyone you put this on for. It may be your friends,
it may be your family or both.

So what would happen if you didnít put on your plastic
face everyday? Wouldnít you be letting everyone down
who depends on that persona to entertain them, to make
their existence better? Wouldnít you be lying again by
being you because youíve always been lying?

This could not only ruin your social life, but possibly get
you fired because your boss may expect that outgoing
salesperson he first hired. All of a sudden, you want to be
you instead of the fantasy thatís magnetic, appealing and
irresistible.

I say change to be the real you, even if it does a lot of
damage. But what if you donít know who the real you is
because youíre so stuck in this vacuum that breeds and
feeds fake? Then you need to do some serious ďsoul
searchingĒ.

Ask yourself, what means most to you? Wasting precious
time being someone your not, or living your life true and
clean? To me, itís a no brainer, but to others who dislike
themselves so much, this can be one of the most daunting
tasks ever.

Why is it so hard to be seen for who we really are?

When youíre taking on this false persona, you feel more
secure because your natural persona, as you see it, is not
worthy. Youíve clipped its beautiful wings and kept it in a
cage so if it wanted to fly, it couldnít, due to your own
suppression.

The most painful thought imaginable is that of the time
wasted. Most of the time, years can never be recouped. In
addition, if change towards your natural personality is never
achieved, your whole life just may be a lie.

Not only will you gain more respect from your family and
peers, but more importantly, you will always respect
yourself no matter where life may bring you. So make the
change, and donít waste anymore life, itís definitely not
worth it

How would this look on your headstone? He lived his life
as a lie, but what a great guy.

Donít be that person. Itís never to late to make changes,
no matter how difficult change is. Because being true to
yourself as who you really are instead of what you think
everyone wants you to be, is absolutely the most self
empowering life you could possibly lead.

Not only will you gain more respect from your family and
peers, but more importantly, you will always respect
yourself no matter where life may bring you. So make the
change, and donít waste anymore life, itís definitely not
worth it.

--by Brian Maloney-ValuePrep.com
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